I have a blog about you.

I spent much of my weekend at Friendly's it seemed. I called Gram Saturday night and asked if we could go out on Monday instead as I didn't want her to wake up too early. "I have news for you," she said. "I will be up for the 7:00 mass." We decided on an 8:00 breakfast date at Friendly's. I arrived at Gram's and she immediately told me she was hungry. We made our way out her door. Let me say that I have had my car for almost two years. Every time I go to Gram's the following occurs, "Wowee, whose flashy car is that in my driveway?" I tell her it's mine and she makes her way down her ramp.

Gram is extremely hard of hearing. I say "Do.." and she immediately will say, "Heh?" I can't say half a word without her asking what I just said. The car ride was full of Heh's. My sister, her twin sons and my mother met us at Friendly's. I decided it would be a good time to tell Phyllis of my blog about her.  I knew she would have no idea what a blog was and I expected her exact reaction.  I speak so slowly to Gram because if I don't, all she will say is heh. See for yourself.




I don't know what I enjoyed more.  "Flattered?"  Or the fact that she rolled her eyes at my blog title.  She did not ask any questions about the blog and went on to inform us that my aunt was sick, "you know, upchucks."  The waiter, Victor, took our plates and Gram said she was full and didn't even finish her pancake.  I said I was full too and didn't finish my meal either.  She asked me what was left behind because it "sure didn't look like much." 

I brought Gram home and quickly tried fixing her phone.  I had plans and was not able to fix it in time.  She needs her phone to ring seven times as she can't hear or can't get to it in four rings. I have called Gram from outside her front door and I jump when I hear her phone.  It is very loud.



I left Gram's and promised to return the following day to fix her phone and to take her grocery shopping.  I was at my sister's the following morning when Gram called and asked if I was there.  She didn't try my cell phone.  She asked if I wanted to go to lunch since Friendly's had the $9.99 deal.  I agreed.  We went to Friendly's.  Our meals each came with ice cream.  Gram (the diabetic) ordered vanilla ice cream with hot fudge.  She was wearing a cream color turtle neck.  I looked up and noticed fudge spots all over her shirt.  I pointed this out. "Ahhh shit!  Why did I have to wear this?"  This statement after she told me she fell asleep watching mass that morning.  We finished our desserts and went to the grocery store.

Gram gave me a list and told me she would wait up front.  Items included were one pear, handful of green grapes, 1/4 pound of turkey, strawberries and two blueberry bagels.  I gathered the items and happened upon Gram in an aisle.  Gran crackers were placed on her walker.  They were not on the list.  We went to check out.  She told the cashier that I had driven all the way from Boston to take her grocery shopping.  Cashier Marie raised her eyebrows.  I explained that I was visiting for the whole weekend and not just doing a grocery run.  Gram asked me to get her a pack of gum and told me to get a pack for myself.

We left the grocery store and returned to Gram's.  I was unsuccessful at fixing her phone as it is a problem with her plan that I need to address with my mother.  Gram thanked me for taking her to the store and for having a nice lunch with me.  I kissed her goodbye and told her I would see her in a few weeks.

The following day Gram called my cell phone at work. "Meredith?"  I told her it was me.  "I tried calling your phone last night but the goddamn operator kept telling me to dial one."  I told her she must have had the wrong number.  She informed me that was not true.  Then she said, "First, you left your strawberries.  Two, your gum is here.  And three, I am getting a goddamn cell phone!"  She then asked where I was.  I told her I was at work.  She told me I wasn't.  After trying to explain that I was in fact at work we decided that I would call her back.  I am going to call her tomorrow to discuss the Jitterbug cell phone.  I think it's a good fit.