I just had soft serve ice cream for dinner. With Oreos. I didn't feel like microwaving anything. I wonder if I will ever like to cook. I have gone through phases that last three days and I think, cooking is not so bad. Inevitably, these phases end. There is so much effort involved. You have to buy food. I would rather spend my money on my favorite shampoo or mascara. My priorities are mine. I don't think I should be judged. I might die from lack of nutrition, but at least my hair will look good. I also have a lot of shows on my DVR to watch. It's 68% full. Cooking takes time. My time is scarce according to my DVR percentage.
I might be turning into Phyllis. She only made one meal for my sister and I growing up. Goulash. Delicious, by the way. She's also been celibate for 56 years. I haven't been living that long, but I could give her a run for the money. She eats ice cream all the time too. Even though she has "the diabetus." I know how to spell diabetes, but that is how she pronounces the word. One time I found a book at Gram's called, "Living the Celibate Life, A Search for Models and Meaning." I asked her about it as I have no shame, and she claimed it wasn't hers. It was a friend's. I didn't push the matter as she may have been embarrassed, but I wonder where she bought that book.
Your mother is Jewish? Why am I just finding this out now? Did you tell me before, because I can't imagine I would ever forget this fun fact. If this is true, than I am no more of a Jew than you are, making your lame Jewish jokes absolutely hypocritical and meaningless! What do you think about that Miss Jib Jab?
ReplyDeleteNo, my mom is not Jewish. Ilene is my coworker. I refer to her as my Jewish mother. She’s always telling me to sit at this bar in Boston with her daughter so we can meet rich doctors.
ReplyDeleteDamn it.
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